From today’s edition of The Liberator.
By Bill Garrison
Your intrepid reporter has tried in vain to get an interview with the legendary heroic Mae Zing without success. However, we were able to obtain an exclusive interview with a source close to her. The only stipulation, which we are of course honoring, is that our source asked to stay anonymous.
First, why did you want to be anonymous? Surely just being associated with Mae would open up incredible opportunities, and yet, everyone associated with Mae has faded into the background.
Well, isn’t that how it should be? Do you really care to know anything about Alexander the Great’s stable boy? Suleiman the Magnificent’s chamber maid? Honor Harrington’s steward? Likewise, why would you care about Mae Zing’s personal assistant, mechanic, or whatever?
We who are close to Mae are happy to let Mae shine in the spotlight. More importantly, one thing being around Mae has taught us is that it would be wrong to accept credit for something someone else did.
Tell me about Mae’s latest daring exploits?
Mae was, well, as a-Mae-Zing, as usual. Following up on the detective work of your local constable Barney, Mae implemented a bold and dangerous plan to put herself in great personal peril by allowing herself to be kidnapped by the deranged brutal psychopath Timmy, all for the sake of four women she had never even met! As a result, Mae ended up Tasered, helpless, and locked in a cage in unspeakably barbaric conditions with the other four women. I can only imagine what she went through. Luckily, after the evildoer left, Mae somehow managed to free herself and the other women, and contact us to let us know the situation. Your local constable Barney then fearlessly captured and arrested the kidnapper, after relentlessly running him down when Timmy made a futile attempt to escape the law. The rest of us were left to merely watch awestruck at the actions of these two brave heroes. Constable Barney deserves considerable acclaim, and Mae might be considered a combination saint / modern Jane Bond. I can’t tell you happy it makes me to know such champions.
< Here we had to pause the interview as our source was briefly overcome with emotion. And who could blame anyone who regularly sees such greatness in their midst? We continued after the source regained composure. >
How did Mae end up with the nickname “Mae Zing”?
I think it was one of the crew who came up with it, and it fit what she was trying to accomplish so well that the name just stuck. I don’t think I have heard anyone Mae considers a friend call her by any other name. And, really, after all that’s gone on, and given your society, surely all your readers should consider Mae a friend.
How has Mae handled all this fame and praise?
Although Mae has remained steadfastly stoic in public, those of us who know her can how much of a challenge it all is for her and that it is taking superhuman effort for her not to express how she really feels. Her incredible willpower is yet another astonishing attribute of hers for us all to admire.
What can we do for Mae? I heard that, being so ideally modest, she didn’t want another parade?
First, although it’s nice to be recognized, we were all a little surprised that Mae’s justifiable outburst to and take-down of the evil slavers made interstellar news. In order for Mae to continue her life’s work against slavers, it would greatly help if she was below the radar as much as possible. Thus, though we hope someday the entire galaxy knows the name Mae Zing, for now, please don’t publicize her valiant feats beyond your world.
Second, we are looking for suggestions for Mae’s next dauntless blow against slavers. For those of you who were slaves, please send us descriptions of your experiences as a slave before you came here. Mae is only one person and can only do so much, but perhaps she can help at least a few of you get justice, even if it has been delayed. Please help her to do what she can to end the scourge of slavery forever.